“Uduak come follow me let me teach you how to on a diseil generator” bro felix called me from church during service when Nepa interupted their power supply.
I was still feeling pains from my knee cap, the injury i got while hurstling for common five naira.
I still had revenge on my mind but i did not know how to achieve it but then an oppourtunity came which i grabbed with both hands and legs.
Bro felix had a fat ass and so when he bent down to turn the generator his trousers stuck into his asshole, when i saw it an evil idea came into my head.
As he was turning the generator and was about pulling the handle out he inserted a finger in his anus and he slipped the handle out which struck his shin.
When i saw how he screamed i realised i had done an evil thing so i fled for my life and i went later in the evening to beg him.
But atleast that taught him a lesson never to joke with my sensability but not before getting the beatings of my life.
“I need so and so ballons to decorate our house for christmas” a female voice interupted my office work.
Sorry, my office work was not a job in central bank of Makurdi but a job as a salesboy in mercy’s mother shop.
I wasnt paid to do the work it was just ajayie(ask the nearest yoruba man next to you) things.
Every sunday, mercy usually helps her mother to sell in the shop but that day i wanted to avoid going inside the church so i begged her to leave the shop for me which she did gladly.
I had started day-dreaming when i heard a female voice interrupt my long forgotten dream of marrying a white woman.
But the voice i heard was not that of a white woman, it was a voice of a yoruba girl; Tolu.
The same girl that wrote me a love letter. Since that day i had been avoiding her and i always ran away anytime i saw her. But that did not stop her from trying all means to get me.
Tolu was alittle bit taller than i but she was also in jss1 but what intimidated me about her was her wealth and flamboyancy.
Her queens english could make queen elizabeth jealous. I was an area boy who loved pidgin english more than correct grammar so it always vex me if i hear someone speaking and trying to bite their tounges with grammar as if they are the only ones that could speak it.
Her parents were also bloody rich, her dad a V.C at the university and her mum, worked with the education board so tolu thought she could bribe everyone to her side with her cash.
I was one of those people but in as much as i loved money u never stoop myself to go and meet her unless she send gifts to me which i gladly accepted.
“So which one do you want” i asked with a shaky voice.
She smiled and entered the shop with me and closed the door, suddenly i felt air-tight like we were in a tube. I could smell her expensive perfume.
“Is this ones” she said pointing at the selected ones while she behaved like she did not notice the tense atmosphere.
I turned my back to her to get the ballons she pointed at, that gave her the opportunity to bend down and she put something in my shoe which made me turn.
She laughed and told me to carry the ballons for her which i quickly did and gave her. She paid but she still stayed there looking at me.
“Wetin na, you wan chop me” i asked the smiling yoruba girl.
“No, am just admiring your lips” she said, which made me suspicious and i touched my lips to see why someone would admire it.
She gave a small laugh and before i could ask her whats wrong she pointed at an unknown place which i turned and saw nothing.
She used that oppourtunity to come close and grab me, before i knew her tongue was in my mouth.
I did not go to heaven this time, i only saw the devil sitting on a mango tree and saying “I don catch you”.
I was powerless to stop her and i was almost getting ready to savour the moment when we heard a knock on the door, we opened to see mercy who did not suspect anything because she saw Tolu with a hand full of ballons. They both went out and left me alone.
Why na when b
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